Rich Moran
Out Of the Air
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged jobs, careers, Entrepreneurs
“You have to see it. Have to.”
The advice is about the movie “Up in the Air,” any everyone who works for a consulting firm, or has ever worked for a consulting firm, has heard that sentence by now. As a former Accenture Partner, I heard, “You have to see it” and I saw it. The movie is good and I see why the road warrior consultant can identify with it.
The truth is that real life on the road is worse than depicted in the movie. Navigating the airports and security is worse than depicted in the movie. First class is not likely. Dealing with hotels is worse than depicted in the movie. Maybe looking like George Clooney is the secret. Dealing with weather problems is the big variable that makes life on the road miserable. And, sometimes, dealing with clients is worse than the movie shows.
Night life when on the road may not start until 10PM because that’s how long you spend working. So there is no night life because you are too tired. Dinner is likely to be a bad room service meal eaten in front of a television.
Since the life is not a good one, and everyone knows it when in the middle of it, the main reward is food. So to compound the problems, life on the road usually means gaining weight which makes you feel more miserable. The best part of life on the road is returning home.
The movie should be required viewing of anyone thinking of going into a career that requires a lot of travel. The simple rules that the movie points out are worth repeating:
- Never check a bag.
- Always wear loafers though security and always get behind others wearing loafers
Contrary to the movie premise, the one with the most frequent flyer miles does not win. Being in the 1K Club at United is not a good thing. If the sound of a zipper closing on a suitcase makes your children cry, you are flying too much.
Now, about the sex thing in the movie. I once had a senior executive tell me, “What happens on the road, stays on the road.” Maybe it happens and I sort of heard about it from time to time, but it sure isn’t the life of any consultants I know.
Workplace Words: Some Authentic, Some, Not So Much
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged Workplace Wisdom, jobs, careers, Entrepreneurs, Workplace
Buzzwords in business come and go and right now there is a pretty good crop of good and bad ones circulating among the cubicle world. Some are whispered in hushed tones next to the refrigerator note that shouts, “This Fridge Will be emptied of every thing except salad dressing every Friday at 3:00!” Others show up on every page of a 60 page power point deck. But, at the end of the day, the paradigm for mission critical buzz words is never about the total quality of the thought; it’s about the value add to the value added thought outside the box.
As we enter the new decade, here are some of my favorite words and phrases, and others, that are already mind numbingly repeated although no one knows what they mean.
- It’s complicated – A perfect phrase to describe everything we now know about business and the universe. These two (or is it three?) simple words can answer any question: How is your love life? Worried about your job? Any luck with your project? How long do you think you will last in this job? The perfect answer that connotes substance but probably more than you need to know – It’s complicated.
- Fair Enough – Could be a comment, could be an answer, could be a question, could be a filler when no one else is saying anything. Could also mean, You are a jerk and know nothing of what you say but now you’ve said it so, “fair enough”. It hits my list since it crops up often and can be used in so many ways.
- Not so much – A perfect description of life in the workplace that sins on the side of negativity without being offensive. Can easily be a proper response to questions like: Hey, do you like your new boss? Are you thinking about retiring on your 401K these days? Boy, those people in Washington are doing a good job, huh?
- Regifting – A phrase that hit all the headlines this year. It is in the same category of staycation, Maverick and Tea Party Patriots. When I hear these words they make me ask myself, Do I want to get involved? Not so much.
- I’m Good – The most reassuring phrase out there that too, has many meanings. When waiting to meet someone, if the receptionist asks if you want a coffee or water, the response can be “I’m good.” When falling off the roof while cleaning out the gutters and your wife asks if you are ok, the response can be the same, “I’m good.” After a layoff, this is a desired response. A close relative to “I’m good” is “I got it.” Can apply to catching a ball in center field or a way to say, “You don’t have to say anymore, I understand.” It’s a good phrase to employ to start doing and stop talking which is always a good thing.
- New Normal – Although on the verge of being over used, this is a worthy phrase to reconcile expectations. For most of us, the new normal means the same way it used to be, just with a lot less.
- That Feels About Right – A welcome phrase used in any context but is especially welcome when asking for approval while in the front of a conference room giving a presentation. It implies “we could probably get more data but that won’t make us any smarter so let’s just go ahead, good work.”
- Hiking the Appalachian Trail – We have the Governor of South Carolina to thank for this one. When you hear he or she is out “hiking the Appalachian…” it could mean a missing persons report is being filed; it could mean there is sex with South Americans involved or it could mean there are a lot of clueless people around who think they are not going to get caught for whatever they are doing. It is a phrase to avoid when it comes to your own life.
- In the phrases full of friction category and ones that will go away soon, I hope, some of my favorites are:
-Become a Fan – I like being a fan of the San Francisco Giants but I don’t want to be a fan of Edna’s scones.
-Skill up- I think this means get smarter and more equipped to do your job. Is that new?
-Fat Content- I don’t need any more reasons to feel guilty. When referring to an organization, there are better ways to describe too many people. Let me enjoy my cheesecake.
-Narrow Aperture – I think this means focus on the most important things that need to be done. This is another phrase that makes me feel guilty for not paying attention in Photography class.
Work today seems be made up of ambiguous victories and nebulous defeats. Let’s at least make life in 2010 a little more bearable by using words and phrases that make us smile, just a little.
Wine Country Wish List
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged Uncategorized
I bet just about everyone in wine country has been told something like, “You are living the good life.” More times than I can count I have been told I am like Russell Crowe in the movie, “A Good Year”. I just don’t look like him. We are living the good life here and this time of year I am especially thankful. Sometimes it takes people telling us how lucky we are for us to realize the gifts we have here. There are, however, a few gifts that might make my wine country life more complete. Here are just a few items on my wish list:
- Joe Montana’s House. So what if it’s $49 million? The photos look really good and for that much money it must include hang around time with Joe and a big crew to take the garbage out to the curb.
- A pass that allows me to cut to the front of the line at
Taylor - Speed bumps on the road in front of my house. Warning signs of mudslides, oil spills or nails in the road might do the same thing. I am flexible.
- A Hav-A-Hart trap that warns me if the animal I’ve trapped is a skunk. The skunks like the cat food left for the barn cats but they don’t add much to the wine country experience.
- Delivery of a pastry every day from the Model Bakery. A latte too while we are at it.
- There is a tractor and attachment that I hear picks up all the leaves and makes them disappear. I am not sure where to find this tractor or where the leaves go but I want it.
- An instant wine cellar. Easily accomplished if each winery in
Napa - A Flux Capacitor that, once turned on, would allow me to stop all surrounding traffic in order to make left hand turns onto Highway 29.
- An exorbitant offer from someone who is just driving by our house who decides they want to buy it. Then we could have a family meeting so that we could respond with a “No!”
- The miracle wine glass repair globe. No matter how bad the shattered or chipped wine glass, stick the pieces in and voila, a new expensive looking glass.
- Karma signs out in front of the house. Instead of saying, “No Winery this Lane” or “Tasting Hours 11-5”, the karma sign would tell potential visitors whether you feel like having them or not. The sign could flash, “Sorry, Not Today” or, “Lucky You, We are Here and Feel Like It, So Come On In!”
- Tomatoes in January that taste like the ones we grow in August.
- A gopher finder/eradicator. If I can go on the web and find out how to drive from here to Saskatchewan and the value of every house in between, why can’t I get rid of a few pesky gophers?
- Every winery selling out of all the wines that they want to sell.
OK, so this list is like the one I compiled not long ago that included motorcycles, White House invites and dates with
Diane Lane
We are all in a special place that is a daily gift. Remember that we are in a place that people come from all over the world to experience.
All I want for Christmas is time - time with my family friends and time to spend in wine country and the satisfaction that this is all I need.
Characters
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged Uncategorized
I want to be a character. I want to be around characters, they make life more interesting. Not the weird scary guys but the ones who live a full life — the ones who people want to be around. People find characters fascinating because they have so many dimensions, and we wonder how they learned about this or that. We talk about characters years later. Characters make you hungry when they eat, and they eat things you never heard of.
Read the whole article in the St. Helena Star here: http://bit.ly/XT7rS
At the Ritz
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged UncategorizedWe bought our home in the wine country for my daughter’s wedding. She was three years old at the time. She is now in high school and knows this story although she has not committed to the location.I continue to tell her that after medical school (or other appropriate vocation) she is welcome to invite a few friends and future in-laws to her wedding at our house.Read the whole article in the St. Helena Star here:http://bit.ly/mekXT
Summer Visitors
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged Wine CountryLife in Wine Country is always better when there are friends around, especially if they don’t stay too long.When there are no friends scheduled we tend to forget to relax, work too hard in the gardens or vineyard and not pay attention to how we look or smell. Friends are an incentive to show off the new barbeque grill and the new cargo shorts. Without friends, we might go a little too native.
Read the whole article in the St. Helena Star here: http://bit.ly/uC8v0
Laws of Convergence
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged UncategorizedMoran’s Law of Convergence
· Two cars going in the opposite direction will always pass in the narrowest point in the road.
· If there’s a bicyclist on the same road, the chances of all three passing at the same point are increased.
· Two families leaving a restaurant at the same time will invariably be parked next to
each other.
· No matter the size of the parking lot, someone will be leaving or pulling into the spot next to yours at the same time.
· If you want to see something from the road, a bus or eighteen wheeler will pass and get in your way at the exact moment you could have seen it.
· While taking a photo, someone will walk between you and your subject at the exact time of the click of the shutter.
· The maid will always be at your hotel room when you go to it at break time. If you really have to use the bathroom, the odds are increased.
· Toll takers will always change shifts in your lane when it is your time to pay.
· The car will always be parked on top of the hose.
· Conversation with a child will always start immediately after they dive under water.
· Morning walkers will always be passing by when you go to get the newspaper in your underwear.
· Special events will always be scheduled at the same time. If you haven’t been out in a long time, there is a multiplier effect at work here.
· The letter will always run over so that only one line is on page two.
· The airplane pilot will always tell you where you are and talk over the movie soundtrack at the most critical point of the movie.
· The toilet paper will always run out when it’s your turn.
· The Harley will always be riding next to you at the most critical point of the cell phone conversation.
· When pressing the button for the classical music station, it will always be during the three seconds of silence between movements and you turn it up much louder to see what’s wrong.
· While on the phone in your car, the most critical part of the conversation will occur while going through a tunnel or as you enter the underground parking garage.
· The more you have to go to the bathroom, the greater the likelihood that the “cart will be blocking the aisle”
· When traveling by air with children, you will always be assigned to sit in the emergency row, the one place you can’t sit that will cause great commotion when you board.
· The windshield wipers always work until it rains.
· The cursor will always block the spot on the computer screen that you need to see.
The Driveway Convergence Conundrum
· When you pull into a driveway to turn around, the owner will be standing in the garage.
· When you pull into your own driveway, a walked dog will invariably be going to the bathroom there.
· When you’re backing out of your own driveway, someone will be walking behind your car.
· When you’re backing out of your own driveway, the neighbor across the street will also be backing out of their driveway.
The law of converse convergence
when you want something to be there, it isn’t.
· When up a little early, the newspaper won’t be there.
· If you’re early for a flight, it will be delayed. If you’re late in arriving at the airport, the flight will take off on time.
· You will always be on the left side of the airplane when the tourist attractions are on the right.
On Judgement and the Governor
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged jobs, mark sanford, feedback, careers, Entrepreneurs, Current News, Workplace
There is no need to pile on South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford for his problems. There is enough opinions flying about should he resign or not and the future of his marriage. But there is an organizational and career lesson to be learned from the good Governor’s adventures. The lesson is, if you indulge in bad behavior and misdeeds you will get caught. I repeat, You Will Get Caught. Since most people, even children, know they will get caught, it just makes me wonder when high profile people do irresponsible things.
At work, in general, truth will prevail. I have just seen it too many times. It may not happen immediately, but bad people doing bad things do get caught. So will you.
In that light, I have questions for the Governor, I know he won’t answer them but I am dying of organizational curiosity:
- Did you think you could go away for five days in another country to meet you girlfriend and not tell any one where you were going and that you wouldn’t get caught? If a state employee like a clerk at the DMV in
South Carolina - Did you have fun in Argentina knowing that the entire country was wondering what the hell happened to you especially since your wife was saying she didn’t know where you were either? Bernie Madoff knew for years that he would get caught and ran his business accordingly and maybe he is a guiltless guy but when you know you will get caught it sort of takes the fun out of the trouble you can make.
- Have you heard of John Edwards, Eliot Spitzer, Bill Clinton or the guy who taps his foot under the stall in the men’s room? These guys aren’t from ancient history. I have heard parallels drawn to you and Herodotus, Thucydides and other guys I sort of remember from Western Civilization 101, but the examples of getting caught are recent and frequent.
- Do you remember high school? In high school if you were dating one girl and went out with another, the entire school knew by the next day. Now all of
Argentina and theUS - Do you want to run for President? Even Michael Jackson, Farah Fawcett and
Iran - What about later, did you think about that? Fantasize forward to a time when you could be elected to a bigger office. That is the time when all the information would come out anyway. JFK and Thomas Jefferson are still getting caught.
- What did you plan to say to everyone when you returned since I bet you assumed you would get caught? OK, I know, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I apologize to everyone I hurt.
- Who did you sit next to on the airplane to
Argentina
People are fascinated by the Governor’s Big Adventure and it is mind boggling how he even pulled it off logistically. Like so many others before him, he is caught and the lesson for you, and me and everyone at any level in the organization: Do something weird or bad and you will get caught.
Career Night
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged jobs, careers, Current News, Entrepreneurs
Career Nights – Blast from the Past
- The students are not interested. Sure they show up because Mom or Dad or both suggest it would be a good thing to attend, but the student is more interested in the homework that isn’t done and due tomorrow. When it comes time for questions in the break out sessions, the most they can muster is “Do you make a lot of money?”
- The speakers are either self-important, secretly wish they had opted for a more challenging and lucrative career, or wish they were still in high school. Most are prepared but the audience is a tough one. It is not an easy role to try to convince a sixteen year old that the life of an actuary is wildly exciting.
- The information is still awful. Instead of a flyer that declares, “So You Want to Be a Brain Surgeon!” the new info declares “Careers in Brain Surgery for the 21st Century!” In a list of Hot Professions for 2009, the list included:
- Auditor
- Health Care Technician
- Networking/Systems Administrator
- Nurse
- Software Designer
- Counselor
Without checking, I would bet that is the same list given out to the Classes of 2000, 1990, 1980, and 1970. And I know kids have changed but I would guess the prospect of any of these careers hold as much interest to the high school student today as they did to earlier classes. A cynic would say those are still the hot careers because not a lot of people want to do them. Supply and demand.
In spite of the current economy, I don’t know if there has ever been a more exciting time in career choices. Everything is changing in wild ways. What is happening in technology, finance, energy, healthcare and even the government arena are creating huge changes and huge opportunities.For all of you auditors and health care technicians and others out there, no offense and I hope you enjoy your work. For all you undecideds out there, find something that makes your heart go pitter patter.
This and That
Published by Rich Moran on Tagged jobs, careers, Current News, Workplace, Uncategorized
Ideas for blogs about the workplace and careers don’t usually pop out in surf shops.
Surf shops for me are the place where I check out the banged up old boards and wish I was younger whilst the rest of the family checks out the latest fashions for people that hang around water. Surf shops at one time reeked of fiberglass fumes, now they are more likely to send off bamboo vapors from yoga mats. But this week, I enjoyed a most revealing, unusual and gnarly chat about careers with a dude who happens to work in a surf shop.
Before the question, “Can I help you?” could even be asked, the surf shop dude looked at me and asked, “What do you do?” It is never an easy question to answer (just ask my mother), but when asked by a young guy with a long dot under his lower lip and borderline dreadlocks, I wasn’t sure if he really wanted to know or not, so I chose to take the easy way out.
“Oh, a little bit of this and that.” I said, not dismissively, but more like, it’s too hard to explain what a career of venture capitalist, writer, consultant, wine maker would add up to.
“That’s cool,” he smiled, “I’m doing this before I do that.”
“Sometimes this is better than that, you know, so don’t be in a hurry,” I counseled.
“I know, but sometimes if you do this too long, that never happens. That probably pays the bills better but since I don’t know what that is, this is cool,” he said.
“Given the economy, you are lucky to have this,” I countered.
“Yeah, that for me is going to be really expensive and not sure if it will have a payoff, so this is good enough,” he postured.
“Lots of times this turns into that and you don’t even know this is it. When this happens you usually wonder about that,” I finished.
“Well, I know when I do that, I can’t do this and this is what I love. Do you ever wish you were still doing this instead of that?” he asked.
Given that I was talking to a twenty year old in a surf shop on the beach, it was hard to respond any way other than, “This and that can both be pretty good. Different times require looking at a lot of this until you find that.”